Thursday, July 28, 2011

remember.

{I've debated about whether or not to write this post, it's a hard experience to put into words. However, I think it'll be therapeutic in a sense to write it}

At camp last week, something tragic happened. Our social worker, who helps with the adoption, and her three beautiful adopted girls were killed. Gone. In a split-second, they were dead. Laurel and her family were on a vacation in Wyoming. While leaving their camp grounds because of a severe storm, they were caught in a nine feet deep flash flood. They were trapped in their car and couldn't get out. The father, Alex, survived. The rest of his family didn't.


"The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord"
Jeremiah 29:11
Taken from my diary:

July 20, 2011
"Our good friends Laurel and her three beautiful children were killed yesterday. There are no words. As my brother Caleb walked up to me with tears in his eyes and told me that my parents wanted to talk to us, I had a feeling that something was wrong. Dad took us outside of the conference center and told us that Laurel and her three children's lives had been taken in a flash flood that day. I was heartbroken, and here, hours after the shock, I still have to words to describe it...My heart hurts. I long for the possibility that the news reporters are wrong and that they're still alive, even though I know that isn't the case. They're gone. In the blink of an eye. When they woke up that morning, they didn't know it would be their last day on this earth. God was the only one who knew this would happen. While I know God is in control, it still hurts. It's easy to sit here and just think "why?" But I know God's plan is perfect. Throughout my life, I've never gone through something like this. It's hard. Really hard. But I am resting in the fact that I know my Savior has a plan for all of this in my life. We serve an amazing God."

On Wednesday, as I walked into the memorial service, Moriah holding my hand, I felt so many differing emotions. I felt tears streaming down my face as I looked at the pictures of those three beautiful girls and their mother. Their smiling faces, their almond shaped Asian eyes. Laurel's amazing high-lighted hair and her nose ring {I always thought it was the cool-est thing known to mankind.} As people walked up to the podium, their hands grasping Kleenex and trying not to cry, they spoke of their favorite memories about the girls. How Zoey adored the color orange, how Hannah was "the little mother," and how Lucy was amazingly resilient for everything she had gone through in her little life.

I'm still heart-broken about it. I still have trouble believing that they are actually gone. I know that it will take time to heal, and my heart just aches for their father and husband. His whole world is gone--I can not even imagine.

Through all this sadness, I am taking a lot of comfort in the fact that God knows the number of our days. Before we were even born he had planned out our entire lives. While I struggle with the "whys" I remember that God knows why. God knows that this is for our good, and most importantly, God's glory.

It's been a hard week, but I am thankful for God's word that is so comforting in times of suffering. How grateful I am to be resting in the assurance that God is in control.

"See now that I, I am He, and there is no god besides Me; It is I who put to death and give life. I have wounded and it is I who heal." Deuteronomy 32:39





3 comments:

Kiley said...

This is so sad. It makes me hurt. I can't imagine loosing not just one, but all three of your children. That is horrible. So sad.

I came over here to tell you how I did my new design. I googled how to remove the header, then did that and then all I did was put a picture on the sidebar. It was super easy.

Keely*luv2write* said...

I am about to cry. I am so sorry. That, I know is little comfort, but I'm glad to know now. You see, I heard about the tragedy at camp and I never really understood or knew. I am praying for you.

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